REPOST: What are you growing?

I often send you guys over to our Children's Ministry blog where Nicole and I keep you updated on our week to week details and going-ons at Spencer County Campus.  Along with the occasional entertaining story or quip.  And every so often, some actual helpful advice.  Like today. 

Nicole's post from today deserves repeating, so read it.  Then apply it.

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Parenting is absolutely the most rewarding and exhausting job in the world, hands down. That's probably why I get a constant stream of parenting questions from you guys. I certainly don't have all the answers, but I do have access to a lot of resources that can help, so keep the questions coming! We'll figure it out together.

I read something several years ago that has had a huge impact on the way we parent, and on our ministry to your kids. I can't take credit for it, and sadly, I can't remember who wrote the article. When I read it, I knew it was good, but it wasn't until much later that I realized how incredibly insightful it really was.

In the article the author compared parenting to farming. If you drive past our house next Spring, you'll likely see me and my grandfather in the garden. He has been a farmer for more years than most people have been alive, and he knows A LOT about growing things. If you catch him in the garden wandering through the rows looking at things, which he does pretty regularly, and you ask him what he is growing, I can guarantee you he won't tell you he's growing seeds. He planted seeds. Actually, he probably made the rows and I planted the seeds, but nevertheless, seeds were planted. But he would never say he is growing seeds. Once the seeds are planted, he's already moved on and is looking forward to what will grow.

Okay. Here's the parenting part: he isn't focused on what he has planted, but on what he is growing. What if we applied that thought process to our children. For instance, if I don't say "I'm raising kids", but look ahead and say "I'm raising Godly young women who will honor God with their lives," how does that change my focus? For our family, it has changed it completely.

Here's a practical example: money. What am I growing? I'm not growing kids who get an allowance. I'm growing two adults who understand that all they have belongs to God. I'm growing adults who understand tithing, saving, and responsible spending habits. I'm growing adults who know how to save and budget and don't use credit as a crutch. Does that change the way I handle money with them? I ABSOLUTELY DOES!

How about discipline? I'm not raising sisters who have to be punished for constantly irritating each other. (This one requires serious prayer on my part!) I'm raising two believers who understand that they must always measure their own actions and thoughts against God's Word. I'm raising believers who understand that when they fail, and they will fail, God is always ready to forgive, even though there may still be consequences to their bad choices. That completely changes the way you discipline. It becomes about teaching, not punishing.

I am raising adults who always look for needs around them and take every opportunity to do all they can to meet those needs. That's why our family does mission trips together and also why we put such and emphasis on missions in our Children's Ministry program. We are raising a group of adults who are not self-absorbed, but who see needs around them and try to meet them.

I am raising adults who make healthy choices and know how to keep themselves healthy. I am raising adults who don't fall into the trap of eating whatever they want and then being surprised to find themselves struggling with obesity and health problems. I am raising adults who make healthy choices and who stop eating when they are full. (Yes, that sounds like a no-brainer, but have you ever looked at our portion sizes and compared them to what is a healthy one?? I was SHOCKED!) That has a huge impact on how we prepare meals.

I hope you are getting the picture. This thought process can apply to everything from our kids' relationship with God to their sleep habits. It's simple, I know. But I had never thought about it that way until I read the article that would change the way I think about every parenting choice I make. So when you guys come to me with a question, I may ask you (and have asked several of you), what are you growing? What's your ultimate goal for your kid in that area? Knowing the answer to that question keeps you focused on what you have to do to get there.