A few weeks ago I was invited to a New Year's Party on January 7th at 9:00 am. Downtown at the Hall of Justice. In Courtroom 101. With many other common criminals.
Okay. So, it wasn't a party. And I was only invited because I felt the need to drive 48 mph through a 25 mph School Zone. While zooming past a cop, who I saw, by the way. Which apparently gets you an automatic invitation to that courtroom party in 101. In my defense, I didn't realize I was in this so called School Zone and the normal speed limit is 45 mph. Three miles difference. You can see why I was a little surprised about my party invitation. Surprised would really be an understatement. Ticked off would be a better description. And after almost 15 years of driving, this was my first ticket. Ever. Promise.
I could never be a criminal. Not even a little bit of one. I was almost in tears just being at the courthouse. Of course, this was probably a combination of me not having a clue what was going on, running a fever and feeling a little like dirt, and being surrounded by people who either hadn't bathed or had bathed with Bath & Body Works newest scent, Ashtray Surprise. Slight sensory overload. I was there with people who had traffic tickets, drug charges, hadn't paid their child support, had multiple warrants out for their arrests, DUI's and one guy who had apparently done some very bad things to a whole lot of people that he was having to pay thousands of dollars of restitution to. Nobody was being nice to anyone and just forget about even using manners. Let's just say I was a little out of my element.
So when it was my turn to stand before the judge and she asked me how I was pleading, I threw my hands in the air and exclaimed, "How did my life get to this point?? HOW?? I'm guilty. Guilty." And collapsed into a puddle on the courtroom floor.
Okay, so that's not really what happen. I met with a little man over to the side of the courtroom who explained to me if I would plead guilty, I would only be responsible for court costs and the judge would recommend driving school since this was my first offense. And it wouldn't affect my insurance rates. So, after smiling politely at the judge, I not-so-confidently gave my guilty plea. I mean, no one wants to stand up in a room full of people and admit you are guilty. Even though I really was. After making certain they were done with me, I hightailed it out of there faster than an ex-con who had violated his parole.
And if you see me out on the road now, I'll be the Granny driving the Explorer five under the speed limit. Having to go to court was more of a deterent for me than the actual punishment. Maybe. I havn't been to driving school yet, so I'll let you know.
4 comments:
Whenever I click on your blog I know I will be laughing....you didn't disappoint me tonight either. "Ashtray Surprise" Ha!
so funny!! and why did you have to go to court?? i thought you could just pay the ticket and not have to go?? you poor thing! i got my first ticket in my life this year but didnt seem to care. i was pregnant and late and just wanted the cop to leave me be....comer wasnt so thrilled with the $120 fine though!
Lauren, because I was pulled over in a "school zone", it was an automatic court apperance! I guess they take their school zones seriously in Kentucky!! :) my court costs alone were $134 and I still have to pay for driving school. uhg!!
I had to go to driving school once. I was with a lot of 16 year olds who were, let's just say, less than thrilled to be there. LOL! I was the token old woman. Alex was about six and he told me, "Mom, I'm so sorry you have to go to that school while Daddy takes us out to play today. It's the consequence to sin." HMMMMMMM, where had he heard something like that before! LOLOLOLOL! BTW, I was driving home after VBS listening to Focus on the Family.
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