There are choices and too many things that Mommy says I can't touch and nap times. Occasionally being a toddler can be dangerous to the emotional well-being of those around me.
So here's a glimpse of our week, via simple definitions.
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The Temper Tantrum: an exertion of will by a tiny human being due to loss of authority and the inability to control your own circumstances and emotions. Characterized by kicking and screaming. Can lead to parents making rash and uneducated decisions about how to make tiny individuals stop acting as if their appendages have just been chopped off with a red hot sword.
The Terrible Twos: an extended version of the temper tantrum that can last from 2 days to 2 years. Approximately. Can often reappear during early to mid teenage years. Characterized by periods of happiness and laughter (from child and/or parent) in between periods of wondering why you allowed your child out of bed this morning.
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| What do you mean I can't play with those pretty blue scissors you are using?? |
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| Are you 100% sure??? |
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| My day is ruined. I CANNOT believe you won't let me use that thing with two sharp blades sticking out of it! What could possibly go wrong??!!?? [huge, shuddering cry] |
A Fit: a mini temper tantrum. Characterized by its short time frame and the ability to be redirected easily. If not contained and corrected, can easily turn into a temper tantrum.
The Flop: the beginning of a temper tantrum that results in body being thrown to the floor by self. Usually halted by the realization that things actually are going the way said tiny individual would like for them to go. Please ignore the flop, as acknowledgement results in escalation to a fit or temper tantrum. Also could be a warning sign of pending terrible twos.
The Pause: that moment during the temper tantrum, a fit or the flop where said toddler will attempt to make eye contact to ensure you are watching. Look away as quickly as possible because watching encourages tiny person to escalate. Without your attention, a fit or the flop will sometimes diminish on it's own. A pause during the temper tantrum is often what they call "the calm before the storm". Run away. Fast.
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| A flop with the pause. To make sure I was paying attention to her display of displeasure with her current situation. Which was me blowing my nose instead of continuing to walk down the hall. |
The Hurt Feelings: what happens when a toddler feels he has been slighted and is too tired to launch a full temper tantrum. Characterized by real tears and the inability to be consoled. For hours. As with a fit, can easily escalate to a temper tantrum if not contained or a second wind is gained.
The Triggers: giving a toddler the wrong color cup, putting their socks on too early, walking the wrong way, looking at their toy with the wrong eye, washing their hair, cutting their food in the wrong size, offering the wrong temperature beverage, getting in the car, putting on a shirt, opening the door too fast, etc. You get the point. Basically everything. Also being told no or being asked to follow a reasonable direction that larger human beings don't usually find offensive.
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Sam likely had already experienced the terrible twos before arriving to our home. At least that's how I'll interpret the laughter and warnings received from his caregivers at the time when I eagerly told them who we were there to pick up. "Ohhhh noooooo, Edaso!! He is bad, bad boy!" (Read with thick Ethiopian accent. And he wasn't "bad boy" just strong willed.) He had his moments once home, but he soon learned his way didn't always work out and we quickly moved past his two-year-old period of rebellion. (Although, now we are in his 7-year-old period of rebellion. And the only upside is he understands the words coming out of this hole in front of my head. Doesn't seem to help, but I least I can justify his punishment by the fact that I know he knows English now. Love that kid.)
Charlie is my sneaky, but obedient one. I have a feeling Charlie's two-year-old self rarely had time for something as foolish as a temper tantrum or a fit because he was too busy carefully calculating how to manipulate his neighbor out of their portion of injera without a soul funding out. Or building an entire village out of origami.
Then there was Ellie Kate....
At my house, we have currently entered a stage of terrible twos, characterized by frequent fits, the occasional flop and many hurt feelings. And unfortunately temper tantrums.
The onset was very quick, escalating to full blown terrible twos in a matter of just a few days. As her parental units, we were quickly taken off guard as our sweet compliant baby made the transition to a bold and opinionated toddler, but have recovered nicely over the weekend. (Recovery included extended naps. For her and Mommy.)
If you've never seen 19 pounds of mad, I invite you over. Sometimes it's hard not to laugh. Other times I just step over her and walk away. And then there was that time I carried her kicking and screaming out of a Kohl's because I wouldn't let her play with those oh-so-safe moving stairs. (Note to self: If you accidentally left the stroller at home, just abandon all plans and go home. Don't even attempt to go in said store.)
We spent a few days this week engaged in Operation How-to-respond-when-I-don't-get-my-way. Let's just say it's still a work in progress, but we are catching on to the fact that flinging ourselves on the ground rarely works.
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| Happy lunchtime. Although the moments prior to this included a fit because the microwave wasn't making her quesadilla fast enough. Stupid microwave. But stabbing her carrots into said quesadilla seemed to help the situation. I'm certain she couldn't possibly be cuter if she tried. 100%. |
I told her I would win this battle.
It's kinda my job. I'm the mom.
And the only benefit was her letting me snuggle her when she has the hurt feelings.
Sweet baby girl.
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